I Don't Want To Go On The Cart

Nothing challenges my up beat frame of mind more than when one of my kitties is not feeling their best.
My dear sweet little MickeyGrrrl, who will turn 17 in October, has been having a bit of struggle as of late.
She had a treatable UTI, with that came two rounds of medications.  Her legs and back are slowing down and are a bit painful. With this condition comes a weekly shot in the shoulder.  Her kidneys are showing signs of needing a bit of  support, so I'm now giving her sub Q fluids once a week or as needed.  She also takes thyroid and blood pressure pills.  A true little old Queen.  I'm happy to report, that all of these efforts and more are showing signs of her being very happy and very comfortable.  Aging gracefully. Enjoying her sleeping spots, her hummingbirds, her food, Gus and me.  Still.  I hit a wall about all this stuff this week.  I was talking to a good friend in a effort to frame a context around all that I'm doing for her.  My negative mind went to...well, she'll just die anyway.  This is just prolonging it.  Well, negative mind you get to shut up.  Yes. she is in the winding down part of her life.  Aren't we all really just dying?  So, we might as well live it up!
My friend reminded me of the scene from Monty Python's Holy Grail.  The scene where they are throwing bodies in cart.  One of the people they are trying to throw in the cart says, "I don't want to go on the cart.  I feel fine.  I'm happy!"  She told me to stop trying to throw MickeyGrrl in the cart.   She's right.
I'll go one further, with trying to throw MickeyGrrrl on the cart, I was throwing myself in there as well. I was starting to give up on things.  On life.  Both of us have far too many days filled with everyone and everything we love to get on that cart.  Because we feel fine. We are happy!  It is a good thing to remember.  Now when I get in that place.  I just remember..."I don't want to go on the cart.  I feel fine.  I'm happy!"  Also look at MickeyGrrrl and can almost hear her say..."I feel fine. I'm happy!"
Life is so good.

Are you throwing someone or yourself on the cart? (Yes, I know in the movie this character gets bonked on the head, and tossed in the cart.  It is Monty Python after all.)

Until next week...create to feel great!
39 projects complete! 13 to go!

This week...I made cooling neck wraps for myself and my P2C team.  These were a piece of cake to make.
Strip of fabric (gold glitter cotton...thank you). Make a tube and fill the tube with 1/2 teaspoon of polymer crystals (floral dept. JoAnns or Michaels).   Close up the tube.  Soak in water.  The crystals expand and hold water and have a cooling effect.  These can also be frozen for an added cooling effect.  Now we'll be stylin' and cool all around as we head down the road.  27 days to relay day.  More P2C crafts to come in the following weeks.  And yes...I'm doing my walking training. Thank you for asking.

But I Don't Want To

"Nothing is impossible with a willing heart." John Heywood

Since last August, I've been walking in an effort to train for a local walking relay called Portland To Coast. Come this August 24th and 25th I will be on a team of 12 in two vans taking turns walking legs to the Oregon Coast.  We will arrive at Seaside to a huge party celebration.  I will be walking about 11.87 miles.
I decided to do this as a way to keep me motivated and working out.  Once again, the value of having a vision or goal in mind or the brass ring to go after has hit home.  I think without something like this, I get lazy and to be real honest sitting on the porch or watching TV is way easier.  I think if I could figure out a way to stay in shape and be healthy by doing those two things, I'd much rather go that route.
So, how do I stay motivated?  I keep focused on what I say I want.  And not in a blah boring way, but in a way that is fun, alive and vibrant. Well, and because it's me...colorful and creative.
The last two weeks, my training has slowed a bit, because I tweaked my lower back.  At other times in my life this would have been the finisher.  The show stopper.  Because I have this colorful fun vision of hitting this walking goal, I'm doing what I can to reach it while healing this injury.  A friend of mine said that I now have an athlete's mind set going for me.  Cool.  And yet there are still time when I just don't wanna to walk.  I just don't want to train.  I just don't want to eat well.  I just don't want to.
In those times I go back to my strong vision of what I want to accomplish.  For me the vision has to engage all my senses. I really have to feel it inside and out. That connection is what propels me.  I guess that is what some folks call passion.  Or a willing heart.
I use this idea to create visions for everything I want in my life. It can't be a should've could've would've for me cause that's a vision killer.  I allow me to connect to my inner self and find out what I need to do and want for the best of me.  For there I get colorful and creativity and start coloring in the entire picture.
Yeah, I love sitting.  I love sitting on my porch and I love TV.  But there is much more in life.  I find that discovering the much more to life, some days, it is just a walk a way.

Until next week...create to feel great!

38 projects complete! 14 to go!      

This week...I tried my hand at making a visor.  This one I will wear at the Mt. Tabor 5K Doggie Dash.
This is the fourth year I've done this event.  I love to wear a hat, but they can be hot.  So, I thought about a large brim visor.   For my P2C team mates I will be making the traditional ball cap visor in gold lame.
And in the weeks to come...more P2C crafts as I prepare for "The Mother Of All Relays"! Stay in tuned. (I really do watch way tooo much TV)

Not As It Seems

I went back to the Loaded Brush.  The paint studio that lets you drink while learning how to paint. (Side Bar- Portland folks...it really is a great evening. You don't have to know how to draw or paint. It is freeing and creative.  Go!  Tell Aaron, DeeDee from the creativity blog sent you!)
So, back at the Loaded Brush...
We painted our version of Van Gough's Sunflowers.  I went in to the class fearing I wouldn't know how to do this or how we would do this.  Aaron is such a good and easy teacher, I decided to just trust the process and have fun.  All was going well, I liked what I was painting. We came to the petals. Aaron instructed us in a 3 step process.  The process involved globbing paint on the canvas.  My mind went to how is this going to make petals.  They look like globs of paint.  All I could see were the globs of paint.  I didn't see petals.  I felt like the painting was ruined.  I just kept telling myself, that it was a fun evening.   The next morning the painting had dried.  I had a night's sleep.  I walked by the painting and I saw Sunflowers!  I actually like the painting.  I didn't see the globs of paint. I saw petals.
Out of something so messy came this cool look.  I thought I knew how petals should be painted. I learned a new way.  An unusual way.
After that evening of fun and painting, I got to thinking what else am I looking at one way and maybe there could be another way to approach it?  Could I make petals out of globs of paint somewhere else in my life?
That painting shifte how I view and approach things.  It was a really great evening!

Are you seeing blobs and globs or are the blobs and globs in your life really lovely pedals on you flowers?

Until next week...create (some blobs and globs) to feel great.

37 projects complete! 15 to go!

And here's the painting!  

Allowing All That's Allowed And More

One of my good friends was recently invited to attend an amazing play writing workshop in Italy, this August.  Getting the funds together would mean a true act of faith and courage. My friend is amazing and very couragous.  He set out his intention to go to this workshop.  He told everyone, we all celebrated, send good thoughts and what we could.  The gift of airfare came his way, he told me he almost said no, it was too much.  But it was what he wanted and needed to get to his goal.  My friend later told me that he knew if he turned down any part of this wonderful gift, the rest of the funds he needed wouldn't come his way.  Why? Because we have to allow what we need and desire to enter our life.  No questions. No thoughts of I'm not worthy or this is too much or I don't deserve this.  We have to allow the energy, love, good thoughts to flow.
That's what my friend did.  He's going to Italy in August to the workshop.  For my lovely friend, it is a great honor and will help him become an even stronger play wright. I so happy for him and amazed.
I think we often ask the universe for things and or situations  and then we stand with our arms folded and closed hands.  I'm discovering the trick is to ask clearly and to stand with my heart, hands and arms wide open. Unquestioning. For however long it takes. No trying to shape what we think how it should go. No closing down.  No looking back or around.  That is the trick to allowing the good stuff to flow to you.  It seems easy, but it is not.  I always want to question.  I always stop the flow.
I thank my friend for this example.  It will stick with me and help me allow all that is allowed and more to come into my life!

Until next week...create to feel great!
36 projects complete. 16 to go!

This week's project was a thirft store find for a buck!  A Tim Allen The ToolMan wood working project complete in the box.  I wanted to make a clock for my new writing room.  And this fun kit appeared.

With me...purple polka dots are the way to go!  The clock works!  Guess I better get to painting and decorating my writing room.  Hum....I sense another project coming on!

The Unlimitlessness Of Gratitude

Gratitude.  I'm coming to see that wonderful and powerful word is the key to making life wonderful and powerful.  Expressing and acknowledging what I am truly grateful for is quickly becoming a daily practice in my life.  Even on the days I get cranky or tense.  Looking around me and acknowledging something I'm grateful for, shifts my mood.  Clears my mind.

There really is so much in my life.  Some folks would look at my life and agree.  Others would  not, as I'm so unconventional and a bit quirky.  All that doesn't matter.  I have a lot in my life to be grateful for.   I haven't always been grateful.  There were times in the past that all I could see is what I didn't have in my life.  I was challenged to do a gratitude journal for a month.  With a "I don't have much" attitude, that journal was a impossible.  Yet I kept at it.  Everyday for a month.  Some where along the line, I came to the conclusion, that I had a lot in my life.  Abundance was everywhere I looked.  The problem I was having is that I thought abundance had to look a certain way.  Lots of money.  Lots of new things. Lots of lots of whatever.  Those are nice and yet abundance is way better than all that. I was actually limiting myself by thinking I knew everything and how I defined abundance and what I was grateful for.  Limiting beliefs and thoughts create frustration and they-well- limit us...paralize us, sometimes to the point of where all we can see in lack.  When all we can see is lack, we can't really see all the wonderful things in our lives to be grateful for...even if it is something as simple as pasta or running water or a kitty who purrs so loud you can hear her down the hall.  With that shift, life really opens us up to the possible.  Unlimited supply.

What are you grateful for?  Are you willing to express you gratitude?

Until next week...create to feel great!              

35 projects complete. 17 to go.

Project of the week...neckties!  For a friends daughter's wedding party.  There will be 8 in total.  Lovely green silk.

The Big Black Block

I have been writing and creating for this blog for getting close to 3 years.  Each week, I go merrily along my way.  I create and write and post. I let folks know I'm posting with a Facebook announcement.  I have some followers and there are comments, at times.

This last week, I discovered my Blogger account had been hacked.  I had one sick Blog on my hands.  I'm not the most savvy of computer users.  I know just enough to get me in trouble (and have fun).   This hacking and being listed as a harmful site was shocking and a little embarrassing to me.  Once I got over the denial. "This is a mistake.  It isn't happening to me.  Who would do this to a creativity/positive growth blog?"  The anger.  "Damn it Google.  Dam it Firefox.  Damn it non existent tech support!"  And the defeat.  "This doesn't matter.  No one reads what I write anyway.  It is just a stupid blog.  Might be time to hang it up."
Woza!  A classic creative, moving towards my dreams and goal block.  Staring at me in all it's nasty little ugly glory.  It was like the negativity monsters were giggling at me and having a great little party in my head.
This blog attack isn't personal.  The people who set these things up and attach sites with malware and all the other junk they have in their creative arsenal are after me.  They don't even know or care to know me. 
And I know folks read and enjoy my blog.  I love doing this blog.   My blog was sick it needed me to use my creativity to banish the negativity. 
Given my very limited and awkward knowledge of all things computer and tech related I didn't even know where to start.  I asked Broadside (who is my tech geek).  He rolled his eyes and said, "That's a mess.  You might want to just give this up."  Not the answer I was looking for.  
Time to employ some basic "get 'er done" creativity principals.  Time to check inside myself and pull up what is needed to fix this issue.
I asked myself...How curious am I being?  Am I asking questions or doing the research?  Or just tossing my hands up and walking away. 
How flexible am I being in my approach or thinking about this problem?  Just because I don't know a lot about computers and the lingo.  Doesn't mean I can't fix this.  I had to let go of the fact that I don't know everything and had to be willing to find out what I don't know.
Am I willing to get out of my Comfort Zone?  This means really focusing in an area I don't know about.  Almost like going to foriegn country.
Lastly, was I willing to devote the energy to this?  I asked myself how important is fixing this blog?  The thought crossed my mind to just walk away and NOT fix this problem.

As I headed into this new world of saving my blog, I looked at like an adventure.   I kept asking myself those four questions.  I kept asking Google questions.  I kept at the attempt to save my blog and rid it of the junk.   This morning, I did a Google search for my blog and the dreaded message that this site could harm your computer was gone.  I checked in on Blogger's WebMaster tools and got the message that I had no threats and my blog is once again healthy.
So, take that Malware and hackers!  Creativity does indeed banish negativity!  Score one for my team!!!
I feel really good about this and all I learned in the process.  I'm still no techno geek, but I can at least get around with the computers a bit better.

I'm going to start to use these questions with much more awareness for future issues and creations.

Are you facing an isssue or the big black block that is getting in the way of what you want for your life?
Are you willing to work with these questions and see where the outcome takes you?  I'd love to hear how that goes for you!

Until next week...create to feel great!              
34 projects complete! 18 to go!

This week I created a zipper bag out of red brocade.  I couldn't find a pattern I liked, so I made one myself. I hope the person I'm sending this to enjoys it.

Love The Feast

Love After Love

The time will come
When, with elation
You will greet yourself arriving
At your own door, in your own mirror,
And each will smile at the other's welcome,

And say, sit here, Eat,
You will love again the stranger who was your self,
Give wine. Give bread. Give your heart,
To itself, the the stranger who has loved you

All you life, whom you ignored
For another, who knows you by heart,
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

The photographs, the desperate notes,
Peel your image from the mirror,
Sit.  Feast on your life.

Derek Walcott

Do you know and love the stranger who has loved you?  That stranger who was your self?  Are you ready to invite that self to feast on your life?

Until next week...

Create to feel great!                                                    
33 projects complete! 19 to go!

This week's project...a painted gnome for my garden, which is doing great!  I finished up eating radishes.  I waiting for peas and beets.   Tomatoes have blossoms as do the peppers.  And what in the world do I do with a HUGE parsley plant?   Maybe this gnome can help.